Modern Major-general

Here are the lyrics to the song Modern Major General from The Pirate Movie. I think they are quite fantastic and fun and clever. Here they are:

I am the very model of a modern Major-general,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral.
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical,
From Marathon to Waterloo and in order categorical.
I'm very well acquainted with matters mathematical,
I understand equations both the simple and quadratical.
About binomial theorem I am teeming with a lot of news,
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.
(With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.)

I am very good at intrical and differential calculus,
I know the scientific names of beings animalculus.
In short in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern major general.
(In short in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
He is the very model of a modern major general.)

I comprehend contemporary culture North American.
I straighten more piratical erections than Bo Derek and,
I'm in to EST and all the rest, I've undergone analysis,
I've jumped beyond the gravitude to permanent paralysis.
My muse is into music, but my credit I'll not trouble you,
From R&B to S&M, cross over C&W,
To groovin' with the Doobies in my Malibu white-souling tones.
Man, I'm older than the Beatles, but I'm younger than the Rolling Stones.
(He's older than the Beatles, but younger than the Rolling Stones.)

My military knowledge for I'm plucky and adventury.
Embraces M*A*S*H and Star Wars and the 22nd century.
In short in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern major general.
(In short in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
He is the very model of a modern major general.)